The Story Of My Search
I have been searching since I was a child. What I was searching for, I did not know, but I was determined to find it.
I suspect I’m not alone in this life-long quest. This abiding need to find the answer to an unsettling question, is shared by people around the world, some aware of it while others not.
From an early age, I asked questions, I took things apart to see how they worked, I read books, many books. Libraries became my church and the books became my mentors. From astronomy to zoology, from religion, art and spirituality, I devoured them all.
I started to gravitate towards the sciences because I saw immense beauty in it and I focused my search within it, convinced that it held the answer and all I had to do was go deep enough into it.
I dug all the way to a Ph.D. and worked professionally in the field for many years. I completely put my faith in science because everything it claimed, it proved with experiments. How could that be wrong? Right?
Today I see that I had committed myself to science and rational thinking to such a degree that it had become my own personal religion. I would attack any idea that could not be proven with rational thinking; if it wasn’t scientific, it was not correct. I was a bad ass.
Today, the more mature me can tell you that science is only one tool to understand the Universe, and actually a very limited tool.
There’s also another way, another perspective.
The problem however, is that this other perspective is invisible to science, because science, does not currently have the metrics to observe it.
I had reached a dead-end with science as it could not answer my question. Science had let me down and it was time to move forward. As my faith in science died, my enthusiasm for spirituality grew. In the beginning, I did not necessarily understand everything because my overly rational way of thinking was obstructing my “knowing”. I persisted and the more I studied the more I understood.
Slowly, my understanding became experiencing and eventually to knowing.
Today, I realize that my knowing, although new to me, has been known before, by many, and for thousands of years. What I discovered was not something new but something that was always there, I simply uncovered it for myself. It’s available for everyone to discover it for themselves.
Your Purpose in life, if you choose to accept it, is to discover this knowing for yourself. The criterion is that you must want to find it. It requires courage.
Ultimately the search is a choice, it’s your choice.