Lesson 3 – Digging Deep

Find Your True Calling In Life

Lesson 3

Digging Deep

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The goal of Lesson 3 is to dig into your past in order to find the answers to your future.

In the next lesson, you will write your Mission in life using a specific recipe. However, the ingredients for that recipe will be harvested here in Lesson 3.


What’s The Purpose Of These Exercises?

The reason for digging through past memories is to find out how you are wired behind that facade that is your EGO. The goal is to go into your memories in order to find situations and circumstances where your EGO was somewhat less prominent and less involved.

There were situations in your past, especially when you were very young, when you were at your essential nature. During those times you behaved according to a different set of rules than the one provided by your EGO. People may have noticed and said something to you… These are the memories you are trying to dig up.

For example, major life events, stresses, comments from strangers and other experiences are helpful in revealing your inner workings.

However, I don’t want you to actively search for those memories, instead, simply answer the questions in the exercises below in an honest manner. The questions are designed to bring out those moments in a natural way.

From your answers, you’ll have the ingredients to craft your Mission statement in the next lesson.


How To Capture These Memories

You will write them down. I haven’t found any other way to do it. You can’t hold all those memories in your short-term active mind and it’s not effective to record your thoughts on a voice recorder either because you will need go back to your notes in the next lesson.

It’s also important to feel comfortable with the writing tool so that you can concentrate on capturing your ideas instead of being distracted by a new writing tool.

You can either write in point-form using bullets and lists or as continuous text; it doesn’t matter as long as you capture the thoughts.


Don’t Waste The Flow

During the exercises, you may enter a state of mind that is conducive to many memories coming to you at once. This is exactly the state of mind you want to be in while answering the questions.

It will require a bit of effort to reach this state so make sure to take full advantage of it by not stopping. Continue to write everything. This state of mind is beneficial to the success of this course, don’t waste it.


The goal of these exercises is to make you sweat a bit. Not physically but mentally by digging deep into past memories, good and bad, and finding out who you really are behind the false self that is your EGO and why you do the things that you do.



  • With each answer, when appropriate, elaborate with why, how, when, who, what. Feel free to ramble on.
  • Even though you may be working on one question, you may get an insight about another area of your life. Don’t assume you will be able to remember it for later, instead write it down in that same section.
  • It’s important to be open and honest with yourself. Therefore don’t hold anything back. Allow yourself to find those forgotten memories, good and bad!
  • Remember that your answers are not for publication so you don’t need to make it pretty and you will not share it with anyone.
  • You can answer the questions using point form (e.g. bullets and lists) or freewriting. Whatever feels right, e.g. exercise 3.1 may work better in point form.
  • After you finish answering a question, go over what you just wrote and highlight words and sentences that jump out at you. What does “jump out at you” mean? It means, that those words evoke a greater emotional response than the adjacent words.
    • Do not skip this step. You will use these highlighted sections in the next lesson.
  • Before starting, block out an adequate amount of time in your agenda and find a quiet place where you know there will be no interruptions. This will give you the best chance of finding the answers.


Exercise 3.1 – Who Are You?

This is an easy way to start jogging your memory. Read each topic and then write down as many answers as you can think of.

  • What books influenced you? What is the first book that you read?
  • Songs and music that left a mark to this day?
  • Experiences you had that you still remember?
  • Who were the influences in your life?
  • Facts about you?
  • Hypotheses you have created?
  • Insights you had?
  • Pet philosophies?
  • Prejudices?
  • Controversies?
  • Methods of doing something?
  • Risks you took?
  • Surprises that you had?
  • The earliest memories?
  • Role models?
  • Poems?
  • Trips that left an impact?
  • Conversations?
  • Art?
  • Plays?
  • TV shows?
  • etc.


Exercise 3.2 – Make A List Of Major Events That Have Occurred In Your Life

  1. Start as far back as you can remember. Traumatic experiences, life changing events, everything that left a mark on you.
  2. Next, attempt to place your answers in a roughly chronological order. It doesn’t have to be accurate as long as the major events are approximately in the right order. The chronological order will help your mind align to your story.
  3. Now that the list is in chronological order, go through your answers and see if you can add more memories to your list.


Exercise 3.3 – How Did You Spend Your Time As A Child?

Those summers when school was out and you had free time. What did you do? What did you love to do?


Exercise 3.4 – How Have You Helped People In The Past?

How did you help others? How are you drawn to help people? Who are they? What were the circumstances?

What does “helping others” look like to you?


Exercise 3.5 – What Recurring Comments Or Compliments Do You Receive From People?

What commonalities do people notice about you? Even strangers, is there something that many people comment or compliment you on?


Exercise 3.6 – What Comes Naturally To You?

What do you do so naturally you don’t even think about it? This may be difficult to answer because what comes naturally to you may not be obvious to you. Feel free to ask people who know you well.


Exercise 3.7 – What Do You Really Hate To Do?

What situations did you encounter that you really hated? For this question, it will be important to dig a little deeper to find the reason(s).

E.g. “For me it was going door-to-door selling newspaper subscriptions when I was young; I hated it. Why did I hate it so much? It left me with the impression that people don’t appreciate being disturbed in their homes… and I felt like I was the one doing the disturbing for something they did not care about… I’m surprised that I still remember that, I guess it left an impression on me.”


Exercise 3.8 – Who Do You Admire And Why?

Make a list of people you admire and the reasons for it. Be very specific with the reasons. It can be anyone and for any reason, from a famous person to a neighbor.


Exercise 3.9 – What Are Things You Are Most Proud Of In Life?

What have you accomplished, either small or big, that you are the most proud of. Did it require you to do something that was difficult?


Exercise 3.10 – What Would You Do If You Knew You Could Not Fail?

What would you attempt? Think big!


Exercise 3.11 – What Aspects Of Your Current Work And Life Do You Enjoy Most?

Make sure to answer “why” you enjoy it the most.


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6 thoughts on “Lesson 3 – Digging Deep

  1. The only thing that got me through these exercises was faith. It really felt like a lot of work. It took ages and I attempted it twice before I really had the time to put in.
    And then I had all this data and didn’t know what to do it. So the researcher in me in coded it into themes and I had some figures in how many time I had referred to different themes and that surprised me because the things I thought were central to my life actually didn’t come up much and what I found was that emotions was a must bigger thing for me than I realised. When I got to lesson 4, I realised this coding wasn’t necessary as I could just pick out particular words and phrases, but I have to say, it really helped me gain perspective on what matters most to me. I’d be super interested to see what other people got out of the same process because I’m not sure if was the statements about emotions that stood out to me because it’s my thing (which I think it probably is), or if everyone is triggered by emotional things because that is the nature of emotions. I dunno. It was interesting anyway.
    Thanks for the detail. It really pulled up some interesting memories.

    I’ve done if some of these activities before but never in such a constructive way – or for such a clear, positive purpose (other than general therapy). But I imagine if you had never done this stuff before, it would be quite eye opening.

    1. Thank you for that insight Janine. I do realize that there is a lot of work to do in this lesson (maybe too much?). I appreciate that you worked through it nonetheless.

      My goal is to make this course efficient so you are able to find your true Calling. So, in that respect, how can I make it more easier for you guys in this lesson? Should I break the practice section into two separate parts? Assign a certain number of days to accomplish the exercises? Any ideas?

  2. Under “how to capture these memories” you talk about the writing tool, but I think it needs to be more explicit that you want us to use the free-writing technique introduces in lesson 2. I didn’t really understand that until I read lesson 4. Maybe say – use the free writing techniques you have been practicing from lesson 2. Or something obvious. It ties the whole thing in better then. Otherwise lesson 2 seems a bit disconnected from the rest of the course.

    1. To be honest, I’m struggling to figure out how to properly incorporate free-writing into the course.

      Free-writing was very influential for me in the beginning when I started my own journey of discovering my Calling. It’s such a powerful tool; yet I don’t know how to effortlessly incorporate it into the course.

      I purposely did not mention free-writing as *the* official method for answering the above questions because I want to see how you guys do it. Did you naturally gravitate towards free-writing (with or without a time limit) or did you use simple writing?

      Let me know your thoughts.

      1. Hi Araz

        I agree, it’s an essential tool, well, at least some for, of a daily writing habit is. I’ve found it helped me a lot. But I write to get all the rubbish out of my head. I don’t write on topics or ideas. I write the amnoying thoughts circling in my head so I can approach life being more present and focused. It is more like a meditation than your free writing is.

        I confess, I haven’t tried your free writing technique yet at all.

        When I approached this task, I just kind of wrote. I suppose it could be simple writing. I attempted to break it up but ended up starting over and doing the whole lot in the one long session. I just wrote what came to me based on the questions.

        Does that make sense?

        I think free writing or meditative writing could be introduced more as a technique for the clearing the mind, rather than as a self-discovery technique in itself. It’s more like it’s creating the conditions for self-discovery rather than being the mechanism for it.

        What do you think?

        1. Janine, you are right. Thank you for expressing it so clearly.

          Free-writing (without a focused topic) is about clearing the mind of the EGOic chatter and creating the proper conditions for self-discovery rather than the actual mechanism for it.

          Therefore, I will rewrite Lesson 2 with the framework that it’s a chatter-clearing method required for self-discovery but not a tool *for* self-discovery (within this course). That’s not to say that it can’t be a tool for self-discovery but within the context of this course it will be used to clear the mind.

          Does that make sense to everyone?

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